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A New High
From H & I
Our primary
purpose is to carry the message of recovery to the addict who still suffers.
One way we
do this is by holding meetings in Hospitals and Institutions for
people who are not able to attend outside meetings. Institutions
served may include, but not be limited to, correctional facilities,
sanitariums, detox units, juvenile detention centers, half-way houses
and shelters; either governmental or private. Confinement may be
voluntary or involuntary.
Through
working with others in H & I's, members of Cocaine Anonymous
share their experience, strength and hope. Below are some of our
feelings about out H & I experiences.
Remembering
Where We Came From
"My first
experience with doing H & I work was when I had 90 days sober and
went to speak on a panel at a hospital. I was sure I had nothing to
offer, nothing to say. I sat there listening to the speakers before
me and knew they had said everything I wanted to say. When it was my
turn, I just opened my mouth and let the words pour out. I not only
said what someone in the room needed to hear, but things that I
needed to hear.
"When the
meeting was over, I spent some time talking to the patients and
shared some more of my hope, faith and courage. I left that meeting
feeling a sense of happiness and joy I never felt before. I still
feel that high whenever I speak on a panel, especially to a group of adolescents."
"H & I
helps me to remember where I came from. It also allows me to watch
the miracle of recovery change others and in doing so, it allows me
to change myself. There are no words that can describe the feeling
inside when someone I first met at an H & I panel gets his/her
first year token."
"Being a
recovering addict, the most dangerous thing for me is to forget that
I am an addict or to think that I can use successfully, but that is
exactly what my addiction tries to get me to believe. Whenever I go
into a detox meeting, I am always reminded of the simple truth of
addiction and its consequences. This helps me to stay sober and to be
grateful for my recovery. It was passed through this method to me,
and I feel blessed to be able to carry on the tradition."
Gratitude
"Leaving the
correctional facility, I feel ecstatic; grateful for the privilege of
being a vehicle of my Higher Power and hopeful that a seed may have
been planted in the mind of even one still-suffering addict. I share
the miracle of my recovery and how Cocaine Anonymous has changed my
life; H & I service work helps me to stay clean and sober today.
This is one of the ways it works for me. Through service in H &
I, my gratitude is multiplied."
"As a parent,
when I leave a youth lockdown facility, I thank God that it wasn't
one of my children listening to the panel. Most of all, I feel
grateful that I am sober and carrying the message of C.A. to those
who are not so fortunate."
"My reason
for H & I is a selfish one. To stay clean and remain grateful for
what I have. It offers me a feeling of usefulness to God and to mankind."
"The look in
the patient's eyes, the sweat on their foreheads and on the palms of
their hands; they're not sure if they can stay sober another day.
That makes you feel grateful because when the meeting is over, you're
going home. That's the only difference between you and them."
"Gratitude...
Doors opening
instead of closing,
being able to
give it away
the hunger for recovery
The newcomer in
a hospital or institution... gives me humility and constant
realization of hope."
Hope
"It is my
belief that sharing my experience, strength and hope through H &
I's, I hope that I may in some small way help another suffering
addict see a glimmer of hope and a better way of life. But for the
grace of God... there go I."
"When I speak
on an H & I panel, the feeling that something special is going on
is immediate. The patients' or inmates' eyes light up as I'm telling
my story. They've been where I've been and have felt what I've
felt... hopelessness. Now they're sitting in a hospital or jail,
wondering 'Where do I go from here?' As I share the path my recovery
has taken, I see at times the look of hope re-enter their faces. As
they think 'Maybe this will work for me, too.' I feel great, sharing
my hope, faith and courage with the addicts who need it most."
A New High from
H & I
"What do I
get out of H & I? Being affiliated with H & I has given me a
broader outlook on who I am as a person, because I have to give it
away to keep it. Just being able to walk in and out of institutions
is a blessing."
"During my 26
years that I used on a daily basis, I never experienced the euphoria
that I enjoyed last month. While attending a C.A. panel two years ago
in a centre for the Department of Corrections, I observed a new
inmate in complete denial of his disease. During the next year and a
half, I received the gift of watching this man grow through the
Twelve Steps. He was released to a half-way house where C.A. holds
another panel, and both of us participated on that panel. Last month,
he attended the H & I committee meeting and was placed on a panel
that is going back to the same jail in which we met. That same night,
he picked up his 18-month chip."
"When people
look at me today, laughing and cheerful, many ask me what I'm up to.
My response is consistently, 'I'm working with others.'"
If you like what
you've read here, identify with the feelings being shared, and want
to feel similar feelings, you can attend your local H & I
committee meeting and participate in your own recovery by helping others.
"We're
Here and We're Free"
|
Approved
Literature. Cocaine Anonymous World Services, Inc. Copyright 2003. |
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